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Discarding What Others Think of You

Today was the culmination of the main reason I came to Phoenix. (Well, other than the weather!) My group session in Tempe, AZ had an excellent turnout, but large audiences aren't always a forgone conclusion.


As I move from city to city and ingratiate myself with the local communities, it can take time to become established. My level of recognition is still relatively low -- at the moment. While my association with Ethann Fox and Micheila Sheldan definitely helps, there are still plenty of folks who are unfamiliar with my work. So going to a new town every few weeks is like starting over again!

I have to admit, I enjoy the challenge.

In the case of Phoenix, thanks to a great connection from Topher Williamson, I ended up working with Colter Smith, and he has established something incredible while building a hefty following here in Phoenix -- and for good reason! His breathwork workshops are top notch, and I've now participated in two of them -- both of which have brought me some wonderful experiences! His posts to his meetup groups, plus the email blast from the Shrine of Holy Wisdom, my posts on social media and my own email blast resulted in a coming together of a great group of participants.


Caring about What Others Think


But before my talk and group activation, I had the pleasure of working with a new client in person, and we tackled the classic upgrade: Loving herself unconditionally. I also realized she was suffering from something else that needed to be addressed. She cared too much about what others thought of her! This can interfere with so many aspects of life, and yet so many of us suffer from this issue.


I often receive visuals during my activations and guided meditations, and I always verbally describe what I'm seeing. In many cases the visions have deep meaning for the participant, and in this case, I received a very strange one.


Monica (name changed for confidentiality) was standing on a beach, allowing the warmth of the sun to fill her being, (this is a common scene that I frequently start with) and she decided to sit down on the sandy beach with her legs straight out in front of her, like a child about to bury herself in the sand or build a sandcastle.


But this was no ordinary sandcastle! No. This was a CAR. She had built a car sandcastle around her. As a full-grown adult. She was sitting in a sand car. Huh? I was completely confused by this one. What could this have to do with anything? I explained this to her, and she chuckled.

I love this crude but awesome car sandcastle! This was Monica -- exactly.

As she finished building her car, she pretended like she was driving it. She was making VROOM VROOM sounds! Obnoxiously honking her pretend horn while smiling gleefully. Looking around, seeing who she might run off the imaginary road, and laughing hysterically!


That's when it hit me.


This was her not caring of what others thought of her! She was making a fool of herself on the beach, and was loving every second of it. It was a perfect representation! When you can enter your own little world, completely entertain yourself with no regard for your surroundings, you've tapped into your inner child. And the inner child explores without fear of what others think! If anything, they explore and hope to bring you with them, no matter how silly it looks!


The activation was powerful. We were convincing her right brain that she could stop worrying about something that she couldn't control anyway! In her case, this concern was taking over her life. She worried about what her partner thought, her family, her co-workers, and complete strangers!


I know a thing or two about this. Recently I had a breakthrough where I worked through this same issue. It had manifested itself in two unfortunate ways in my own life. My general concern for what others thought of me had caused me to experience nervousness when speaking in front of a group. Though I had made huge progress, and my own activations had made it almost nonexistent, it still effected me in subtle ways.


This same concern about what others thought of me was also interfering with my romantic relationships in ways I wasn't aware until I had my breakthrough! I wasn't being myself because I was worried about how my partner (or potential partner) would judge me. That's exhausting -- especially if you are around the person full time! What a relief to have resolved it, because that one thing fixed both of these issues -- immediately.


That's what we did for Monica. I can't wait to find out how it's changed her life!


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